32 Weeks

How far along: 32 Weeks

How I feel:  I feel exhausted, a little frustrated, and eager to get things done.  I'm getting weary of being pregnant, and I'm tired of being clumsy, unattractive, forgetful, and distracted.  I know better than to think I'll get my life back right after the baby is born, so I'm trying to just take things one day at a time for now.

Maternity clothes:  I really miss fun clothes and feeling put together.  I'm tired of tee-shirts, maternity jeans, and ponytails.  Next fall / winter I need to do some serious shopping and schedule a big girls' night out so I can feel like cute again!

Sleep:  It's pretty terrible now.  I can't get comfortable, I can't stay comfortable, I wake constantly to go to the bathroom, and I get up really sore and achy.  It has just gotten really bad in the past week.

Best moment this month:  Jim and I had a date night last week, and it was a lot of fun to go out for a simple dinner by ourselves.

Movement:  He has had hiccups a little more lately, and he is getting big enough that I have felt limbs (or maybe a head?) pressing on me instead of just flutters.  Last week the ultrasound showed that he weighed just over 4 pounds.  Typically he should have weighed just over 3 at that point, so he's definitely measuring a little on the big side.  (Anyone surprised?!)

Food cravings:  Sour cream and onion chips, Neopolitan ice cream, chocolate and decaf mochas.  (Healthy, huh?)

Labor Signs:  I've had some more Braxton Hicks, but last Monday at my ultrasound she could see that my cervix was stilled closed, so baby boy knows he's still got several weeks of growth on the inside.

Belly button in or out? SO out.  :-)

What I miss: I miss being able to breathe!!  Besides the pressure on the inside, my nose and ears are super congested, so I can't breathe through my nose or hear anything.

What I am looking forward to:  Getting the nursery started and finished!!!!  We have a gallon of paint, fabric for curtains, bedding still in packages, and a few decorations on their way in the mail.  But as of now, the room is still a cluttered disaster.  I'm dying to see order and organization that will make me feel like things are under control.  I'm also very much looking forward to my mother-in-law arriving in another week and a half.  She will be here for all of March and April, so I will have help with the kids during the final month before the baby comes and for a few weeks after he arrives.  What a blessing!!

What I am NOT looking forward to:  I'm dreading the final weeks of pregnancy.  The last four to six weeks are absolute torture for me.

Milestones: I had to stop wearing my engagement ring several weeks ago, which made me so sad.  I know that my wedding band will have to go before too much longer, and I really hate being super pregnant without a ring on my finger!


Weekly Wisdom: I know a girl who, on facebook, shared something she was looking forward to each week at the end of her pregnancy.  I took this to the extreme and planned big things for each of the last six weeks.  Each week I will have a party, girl's night out, date night, massage, or something else to look forward to instead of just surviving until the baby comes.  Next week I've got a girl's night with my friend Rachel M., and a dinner party to celebrate the baby with a few friends from church.  I can't wait!!

Here is a photo of our countdown paper chain.  I did this for Brennan when I was pregnant with Cora, and I felt like it helped him to understand so much better.  We have special events like Grandma's arrival, Brennan's birthday, Grandma's birthday, Easter, and a few other special things in brown, so in addition to counting down to the baby, it is easy to see when Brennan has a fun, big event coming up.

Ready??

Now that I am nearly 31 weeks pregnant, the question of the day has become, "Are you ready?"  And I really hate that question.  Is anyone ever ready?  And with your third child, is it possible to be ready?!  What does that even mean?

Emotionally, I am not ready.  I am eager to meet this little boy and kiss his head and snuggle him, but if I am super honest, I am terrified to reenter the baby stage.  Cora is in Mother's Day Out two days a week, and I really enjoy having productivity back in my life.  Knowing that I am heading back to round-the-clock nursing, dependency, and never having a moment to myself scares me to death.

Physically, I am not ready either.  We don't have a car that will fit our whole family, and we aren't sure how exactly we will pay for one.  We are hoping for a tax refund with all of our medical expenses and education expenses last year, but Jim still has so much to do to put our finances in order.

Also, the nursery hasn't even really been started.  I have ordered bedding, and the last part will come in this week, but I can't even get to the crib because it is shoved into the middle of the room (so Jim can eventually paint the walls).  I haven't started decorations, don't have a plan for curtains...  These things are so unlike me, but I can't do things we can't pay for.

I'm starting to feel anxiety well up within me.  It isn't that I am worried things won't get done.  I know they will.  I'm also not worried that things won't be okay.  I know they will.  What's bothering me is that so many things that need to be done right now are out of my hands.  I don't know how to do the taxes, I can't paint the walls, and I can't study for Jim's classes for him.  Lots of responsibility falls on Jim, and I just hate that.  He is a full-time computer guy, full-time dad, full-time husband, part-time seminary student, part-time teacher, church elder, etc., and I want to take some of the burden off of him.  I may be doing the hard work of growing his baby, but I want to also help lighten his load, and I can't.

I have a constant list going of all of the things that need to be done in the next eight weeks, and I am doing anything and everything I can to get those things checked off.  I have already made Brennan's birthday invitations and favors for his party at the end of March.  For a few weeks I have had everything ironed, organized, and tagged for the consignment sale I'm doing early next month.  Today I unearthed Easter baskets so I can start thinking about preparing for Easter (which I half expect to spend in the hospital).  Why am I being a nut?  I guess it's all my version of nesting.  I can't do the things I want to do, so I'm trying to do the things I can do.

This morning I had some back pain for the first time, and my sleep is becoming more and more disrupted, so I know that the misery is just around the corner.  I'm fully aware that in several weeks I will be extremely ready to get this baby out of my body.  That's another reason I feel anxious to hurry things along.  I know that my days of feeling decent and being able to do things are coming to an end soon.

Anyway, if you see me, please do not ask me if I am ready for this baby.  Will I love him to the moon and back?  Absolutely.  Am I anxious to meet and hold him?  For sure.  But am I ready for his arrival?  Not on your life.  Hopefully my tune will change in the next six to eight weeks.

28 Weeks

How far along: 28 1/2 Weeks


How I feel:  I still feel pretty good.  I have lots of frustrating or annoying symptoms, but I know what is to come, so I'm choosing to save most of my complaints for later.

Maternity clothes:  I'm tired of them.  That's all.

Sleep: If it weren't for Cora having strep throat and waking every 1 - 3 hours every night (for a week!) and now Brennan being sick and waking throughout the night, I'd be sleeping pretty well.

Best moment this week:  Seeing the baby on an ultrasound!  (I am starting my rounds of periodic ultrasounds for thrombophilia this week, and I will now get to see him grow little by little until I meet him face-to-face!!)

Movement:  The little stinker knows when someone wants to feel him move.  As soon as Jim or Brennan puts a hand on my belly to feel him, he stops moving.  Every. Single. Time.  Brennan has yet to feel him move.

Food cravings:  Chocolate!!

Labor Signs:  I can't tell if I was experiencing Braxton Hicks or just pressure yesterday.  I am still not positive if I've ever experienced Braxton Hicks.  I think I have, and I think that's what is happening.

Belly button in or out? Out

What I miss: I miss feeling close to Jim.  I can't even hug him without bending at a weird angle to wrap my arms around his neck.  

What I am looking forward to:  I'm looking forward to having the nursery done and choosing a name for this little guy.  And I am very much looking forward to seeing my three kids meet for the first time.

What I am NOT looking forward to:  Getting even bigger than I am now.

Milestones: I started the third trimester last week.  Ten and a half weeks to go!!

Brennan wanted to try taking a picture of me, and this is what we got below.  It's a little blurry and he missed my face, but it's a pretty decent belly shot.  :-)

Cora's First Haircut

I finally took Cora to get her first haircut!  I've been saying I'm going to do it since her second birthday three months ago, but I just never got around to it.  We went to Snip-Its, which does kids' haircuts with all of the bells and whistles, so that we could minimize tears and fears.

Cora hates to have her hair brushed, styled, or even touched sometimes, so I was really concerned about how she would do.  She was scared when she had to sit in the big chair and get strapped in, and she cried and asked me to hold her, but she got over it when she was given a lollipop and some little trinkets to hold.

Here is a before shot of the back of Cora's hair:

And here is how it looked after:

I was worried we'd lose the little wave at the back of her hair, but I think losing a little length helped it to spring up even better.  :-)

House Goals for 2012

On Monday I recapped how I did at achieving last year's house goals.  I said how much I loved having goals to refer to all year, and I really did.  I am excited to prioritize the things I want to do for my house this year so I can start saving and scheming.  It is going to be a "tight" year, considering we need a new vehicle that will fit three children in the back seat, and I have to pay for a c-section with a huge deductible.  Plus, I really want to save my money this year for a great camera, which I have put off for a long, long time.  But I'm praying for a few people to hire me again this year for decorating and party planning so I can accomplish a few things in my own home!

Because of the year we have ahead of us, I am going to name just two "big" projects (I define a project as big in that it will cost triple digits to accomplish), and the rest will be little things I can do throughout the year when the money "appears."

1.  Make the baby a beautiful nursery of all his own.

• Paint the walls
• Make and buy artwork
• Buy / make crib bedding

This room really needs to get finished in the next eight or so weeks, so it is priority number one!

2.  Beautify this bathroom!

• Put up bead board paneling
• Add color with paint
• Frame out or change the mirror
• Add artwork

3.  Finally do something with this empty wall in the dining room.

4.  Get Brennan new curtains.

In our old house, these curtains were the right length.  In this house, they have shrunk in the dryer and been hung higher, so now I'm committing a real decorating faux pas.  It drives me crazy every time I go in there!!

5.  Frame a map on this wall in the play room.

Jim's parents bought Brennan a world map for Christmas, and I thought it would be fun to hang it in the play room.  Unfortunately, frames of that size cost $100 - $200 (it is not a standard poster frame).  So, we need to make our own.

6.  Paint unfinished furniture.

• Cora's nightstand
• Toy bench
• Storage for half bath

7.  Fill in the living room.

There is so much to do to make this room more like a part of our home, but it is going to be expensive.  I need a new chair, drapes, and an area rug.  Still, a larger vehicle and a healthy baby seem more important!  For this year, I will settle for:

• Another side table and matching lamp for the other side of the couch
• Secretary desk brought down from the bedroom.
• A lamp on top of the desk.

8.  Get a bookshelf for the master bedroom.

Now that we've had to move all of our books out of the guest room, they are in boxes where they can't be accessed.  Some of those books are just fun, but some we really need to access for school and church, so we need a good place to store them.

9.  Make artwork for Cora's room.

10.  Paint the guest bathroom.

This room has no color, no personality, no interest, no nothin'.  It is purely functional and needs a little boost!

11.  Hang something above the bed.

The room will look so much less "naked" if there is something hanging up there.  Every single wall in this bedroom is empty!

It's hard to stop!  I look around and see light fixtures I want to change, walls that need to be painted, and empty rooms that need furniture.  But I think this list is doable and very realistic for now.

What are your goals for this year?

******************
I'm linking up to The Nester's 2012 Home Goals Party.

Reviewing Last Year's House Goals

Last January I set nine house goals that I wanted to accomplish in 2011.  If you want to reread them in detail, go here.  Otherwise, to keep this post from becoming overwhelmingly long, I will simply restate each major goal, show you a before picture, and, if I achieved my goal, I will show an after photo.  Here we go...


1.) Finish the coat closet hallway.  

Before:

After:

2.) Work on the family room

Before:

After:

 3.) (Nearly) Finish the play room.

Before: 

After:

4.) Work on the guest bathroom / kids' bathroom.

Before... and After  :-(

 (That's what you get for setting a goal that depends on your husband without consulting him first!)

 5.) Give some TLC to my craft room.

Before:

After:

(Even though it doesn't look really different, I didn't totally fail on this one.  I have managed to keep the room neat and usable for several months now, and that was part of my goal.  I consider it a huge victory!)

6.) Get curtains for our bedroom.  

Before:

After:

7. Hang something on this wall in the dining room.

Before... and After :-(

8. Trim out the chalkboard wall.

Before: 

After:

(Not only did the wall get trimmed out, but Jim installed an overhead light for me so this little "hallway" is no longer dark!)

9. Add more lighting to the formal living room.

Before... and After :-(

And there you have it.  :-)

Mathematically speaking, I accomplished 6 out of 9 of my goals, which is only 67%.  However, I don't feel like I earned a D.  Honestly, I would give myself more of a B for the use of my time and money.  I mean, that play room alone was a massive undertaking and must count for more than the few lamps and artwork I ran out of money to buy, right?!  :-)

I absolutely loved having this goals list to refer to all year.  Each time I would earn extra money for something, I knew exactly how to allocate the money.  It made my decisions so much easier and more concrete, and I didn't feel guilty about spending money on something I had already decided I wanted to do.  

I am looking forward to solidifying my goals for 2012.  I plan to link up to the Nester's Home Goals Linky Party.  Time to start prioritizing and taking some pictures!!

2011 Goals in Review

Last year, on January 15th, I committed to paper screen the three things I wanted to most accomplish in 2011.  Here were my three personal goals for last year:

1. Read every word of the Bible in a year.
2. Write on my blog at least once a week.
3. Leave the Nashville area at least four times.

So, how did I do?  Well, I accomplished two of the three, and if you read my blog regularly, you know at which one I failed.  :-)

I did read every word of the Bible in a year, and I left Nashville four times.  (We went to Dallas twice, I went to Townsend, TN for a women's retreat in the spring, and we went to Bryson City, NC for our anniversary over the summer.)  I did not manage to blog once every week, but I did become a little more consistent about blogging than I had once been, so it is at least a step in the right direction.

Here are a few specific thoughts on reaching my goals:

Reading the Bible
Reading the whole Bible last year was amazing.  I wasn't always consistent about reading every single day, but I did promise myself I'd get done in a year, and I did.  Reading God's word from Genesis to Revelation was enlightening and powerful and it at least doubled or tripled the size of the box I put God in.  I have been a Christian for almost twenty-six years, and I had never once read the entire Old Testament.  I feared it, and now I have to admit I really enjoyed it!  If it's possible, salvation means even more when you read the whole story.  What an amazing, thorough, perfect, incomprehensible plan God has for us!  Why on earth I hadn't taken the time to read God's whole love story to us is beyond me!

I have two friends already who have told me they have made reading the Bible a goal for 2012.  I am so encouraged that others want to take this magnificent journey, too.  I have been asked now several times what reading plan Jim and I used, so in case you are interested, here are the details:

• We used a chronological reading plan.  Personally, I have never understood how all of the pieces of Bible history fit together.  Before, if you had talked to me about "before or after Babylonian captivity" I would have given you a blank stare.  Reading the Bible in chronological order helped me to connect the dots I already had as well as put some in place that I didn't even know I was missing.
• The website we used is http://www.youversion.com/.  I like youversion because it can sync up with your phone (I finished some readings in car line, at the airport, or at the chiropractor), and it gives you a check box after you've finished a chapter.  This doesn't sound like a big deal, but for someone like me who doesn't always keep up with reading (or who may get interrupted by needy little people), it is very helpful to know where you left off.  I'm not saying that youversion is what everyone should use, but it met my needs better than anything else I found.
• I read a translation that was comfortable for me so I could apply it to my life.  It wasn't King James and it wasn't The Message, but it was somewhere in between.  :-)

If you decide to read the Bible through, please let me know!  I love hearing and seeing the domino effect of one person encouraging another!

Leaving Town
I really am a happier person when I see new things and have adventures to look forward to.  This past year was a difficult year for us financially and emotionally as we had a lot of unexpected things come our way.  I really think that one of the reasons our marriage stayed so strong is because we had three trips out of town together without the kids.  This is a lot (!), and I know it isn't realistic to think we will have a luxury like that every year.  However, I believe that God knew what we needed and when we needed it, and He provided perfectly.

Blogging
Having a "successful" blog isn't as important to me as keeping a record of our daily lives and milestones and having a forum I can use to connect with other women like me.  It does make me a little sad when I pour my heart and soul into a post and no one comments here on the blog, but I've decided that if the blog isn't for me and my family, it isn't worth having.  So for now I'm okay with posting when I am able and letting go of the rest.

********************
I am still trying to figure out what my personal goals are for 2012.  (I do have some house goals, and I'll share those in the next few days!)  I really liked having goals this past year, and I feel a little lost and directionless without them right now (which is so weird, since I have never set any like this before).  However, I know that this year is going to be very different with a newborn, and I don't want to get in over my head.  So, I'm praying and waiting, and I guess we'll see what God lays on my heart.

How about you?  Did you set goals last year?  How did you do?  Do you have goals for 2012?